You do the things that make you feel like a rock star. You stop berating yourself around the clock for everything you aren’t doing, and start congratulating yourself for the little things you get right consistently. You recognize just how worthy of love you are. It’s not that difficult, just pay a little attention to some of your nicer qualities for once. Do the things that make you proud of yourself.
And then, other people have nice qualities, too, and you notice these more than you notice how they fit into one or another cliché. You open your eyes a little. The green-eyed waitress might not like you, but her friend really does, and she’s sort of funny and actually pretty cute and it’s not really that scary when she cries, for some reason. It’s touching, even.
A good director can make an audience fall in love with anyone, just by revealing this or that little quality that makes the person glow, or this or that weakness that makes the person feel small. Start looking at the people you meet through a filtered lens. That doesn’t mean you’ll date the alcoholic or the mother with three insane kids who just filed for bankruptcy. It just means you’re open to what’s there, you’re interested, you want to know more, you’re not rushing to categorize and label every human you meet according to how they’re sure to eventually disappoint you.